I have to climb it to the top（附译文）

By  ZKOCT

It was a late afternoon, I came back from work with my tired body and soul. After a long lonely journey in the city bus(for it has a long distance between my home and my college), I changed to ride my old bicycle, a cigarette was lighted in my hand. Many beauties passed by, I pay no attention as before, for I was really too tired to enjoy their beautiful and graceful styles anymore that I needed to lie down at once. Suddenly, I found a new mast, just so a real mast like the one set in the university I was graduated from in another city of northeastern China, was settled in campus of the prime school nearest to my home.

In fact, I could hardly focus on nothing and nobody for a long period these days, to my surprise, the mast drawn whole my attention. And I suddenly felt I was full of energy again. Thrown my bike aside, I went in to the quiet school. The janitor stopped me with curiosity. “Who are you and which one do you want to see?” was his questions. I also was smiled to my self for my rash. “I want to see no one but the mast.” I told him. “But at least you should tell me who you are.” He said. “I am nobody, I just am a passing by.” I said to him. “Then why do you want to see our new mast?” he asked again. ”I am not only come here to see it, I would like to climb it to the top with the presumption of your allowance.” It was very clear that he was astonished and frightened that he said: “are you all right?” I handed him a cigarette and lighted it for him, and explained the whole thing with care and patience. I told him, when I was young as a college student, I used to climb the mast which was higher than this in our campus almost everyday in the evening time, that made me feel free from the disorder environment and anxiety of nearly all the things, it was the best medicine to treat my insomnia too. I had been in the bad situation for a long time again, so I begged him to approve my climbing. I asked him time by time, and all I said seems so sincere that he could hardly rejected my plan(certainly he had confirmed that I was not a madman and would not suicide there), then he walked me to the mast at last with a warn about no next time again. I thanked him cordiality then I began to climb the mast. I found I was not young before long on the half way I was all wet with perspiration and had to slow down. Down the mask, the janitor also found that, and shouted to me: “come down if you can not do it!” I shouted back: “I will soon do it!” and one step by one step……, at last I did it!

As soon as I been the top of the mast, I understood my heart, because I was face the direction of hers at once！But the mast was still too low, I got only a little wider view, and she was so far away, and still the visibility is not good enough. At that moment, the next aim was located, the television tower.

译文：

我必须爬上它的顶部

BY  ZKOCT

那是一个下午，我从单位下班回家，带着疲惫的躯体和灵魂。经过了一段漫长而寂寞的公车旅行(因为在我的学校和家之间有一段很长的距离)，我又骑上了我的老自行车，一只点燃的香烟在我的手中。许多美女经过，我不能集中注意力在她们身上，我太累了，累到没有心情欣赏她们的美丽而优雅的身段而恨不得立即躺倒休息。突然，我发现一座新的桅杆就坐落在离我家最近的那家小学校的校园里，一座真实的桅杆正像我毕业的东北某市那所大学里矗立的那座信号桅。

事实上，最近很长一段时间我不能集中精力在任何事物和人物上，让我奇怪的是，那桅杆居然吸引了我全部的注意力。突然之间我感到自己完全恢复了活力。扔掉我的自行车，我走进了静谧的学校。看门人充满惊奇止住了我。“你是谁？你找谁？”是他的问题。我也为自己的卤莽自嘲地笑了。“除了那桅杆，我不想见谁。”我告诉他。“但至少你该告诉我你是谁。”他说。“我谁也不是，就是个过路人。”“那你为什么一定要看我们的桅杆呢？”他又问。“我不仅要看看它，假如你许可我准备爬上去。” 他显然是太惊奇而且被惊吓了，说：“你没事吧？”我递给他一支烟并给他点着了火，然后小心而又耐心地给他解释起来。我告诉他，当我还是个年轻的大学生的时候，我差不多每天都会在傍晚爬上我们校园里的那座桅杆，那比这座高。那使我远离尘世间的纷扰和对各种各类事物的焦虑，而且是治疗我失眠症的良药。我又有很长时间状态不佳，所以请求他允许我攀登那座桅杆。我一次一次地恳求他，说得非常诚恳以至他简直无法拒绝（当然他也确认了我不是疯子而且不会在那里自杀），最好他陪我走到那里并警告我下不为例。我诚挚地谢过他，然后开始攀爬。不过，很快我就发现我确实不再年轻了，爬到一半我已经大汗淋漓，速度也自然慢了下来。桅杆下，看门人也发现了，于是朝我喊叫：“不行你就下来吧！”我朝他喊：“我马上就成功！”而一步接着一步，最终，我真的成功了！

一旦爬到了顶部，我就明白了自己的心，因为我正直直地面对着她所在的方向。但那桅杆还是太低了，我的视野仅仅开阔了一点点，而她又是那么的远,而且进一步说，视线也并不良好。就在那一刻，我锁定了下一个目标，电视塔。